![\"\"](\"http:\/\/circassiancenter.com\/cc-turkiye\/z-2013-Images-2\/251.JPG\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Leyla Alp<\/strong> \u0130nsan\u0131n sevdikleri ne kadar uzun ya\u015farsa ya\u015fas\u0131n yine de k\u0131sad\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc payla\u015f\u0131lacak yar\u0131m kalm\u0131\u015f onlarca \u015fey kalm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. Yar\u0131m kalan sohbetler, gidilmeyen yerler, kavu\u015famayan kollar, yat\u0131lmayan dizler vard\u0131r. Daha yenilecek yemekler, tutulacak eller, silinecek ya\u015flar vard\u0131r. Sevdi\u011finiz insanlar ne kadar uzun ya\u015farsa ya\u015fas\u0131nlar onlar\u0131 kaybetti\u011finizde i\u00e7inizde mutlaka bir kimsesizlik \u00e7\u00f6ker. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u00f6l\u00fcm dipsizliktir.<\/p>\n Hani s\u0131ral\u0131 \u00f6l\u00fcm versin denir ya evlatlar\u0131n anne babalar\u0131ndan \u00f6nce topra\u011fa verilmesi fenad\u0131r ama her evlat i\u00e7in anne ve babas\u0131n\u0131 kaybetmek ya\u015f\u0131 ka\u00e7 olursa olsun yetimliktir,\u00a0 \u00f6ks\u00fczl\u00fckt\u00fcr…<\/p>\n Deniz aray\u0131p \u201cAnnemi kaybettik\u201d dedi\u011finde aya\u011f\u0131m\u0131n alt\u0131ndan yer kayd\u0131. Kulaklar\u0131m inanmad\u0131, sesim \u00e7\u0131kmad\u0131. Ne s\u00f6yledi\u011fimi hat\u0131rlam\u0131yorum. Sustum kald\u0131m\u2026 D\u00fcnya sustu\u2026 \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insan\u0131n annesi \u00f6l\u00fcnce t\u00fcm d\u00fcnya susmal\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n Sonra a\u011flad\u0131m\u2026 a\u011flad\u0131m\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cAnnem ilk vuruldu\u011funda, haber verdiler ko\u015ftuk, biz daha varmadan amcam gitmek istemi\u015f onu da vurmu\u015flar. Gitti\u011fimde amcam\u0131 ta\u015f\u0131yordu kom\u015fular, annem dedim sokakta kald\u0131 dediler, ben gitmek istedim tuttular, a\u011flad\u0131m a\u011flad\u0131m a\u011flad\u0131m\u2026\u201d<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n Yol boyunca nas\u0131l olur diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fc hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum. Nas\u0131l olur? Evet ya\u015fl\u0131yd\u0131 Ferdi\u015f\u2026 Kendine g\u00f6re altm\u0131\u015f be\u015f falan, kimli\u011fe g\u00f6re seksene yak\u0131n\u2026 Ama yine de erkendi. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc hep erkendir\u2026 Demek k\u0131p\u0131rt\u0131s\u0131z yat\u0131yordu \u015fimdi Ferdi\u015f\u2026\u00a0 Haber vermek i\u00e7in kimi arad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 ne dedi\u011fimi hat\u0131rlam\u0131yorum\u2026 Annem art\u0131k nefes alm\u0131yordu\u2026 Annem art\u0131k\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cAnnem soka\u011f\u0131n ortas\u0131nda kald\u0131 \u00f6ylece \u00f6nce belli belirsiz k\u0131p\u0131rd\u0131yordu, sonra saatler ge\u00e7tik\u00e7e hareketleri azald\u0131\u2026 Kimi aramad\u0131k ki; vekilleri, kaymakam\u0131, valiyi, dedik \u00e7eksinler \u015fu kargalar\u0131 \u00f6ld\u00fc \u00f6lmesine de cenazemizi alal\u0131m\u2026 \u201c<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n Birden fazla anneye sahip \u015fansl\u0131 inanlardan biri oldum ben. Ferdi\u015f benim hem annem hem prensesim hem de her \u015feyimdi. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insan\u0131n annesi her \u015feyi olur\u2026<\/p>\n Elimi kuvvetlice ilk tutu\u011funda y\u0131l 2002 olmal\u0131. \u00d6yle g\u00fczel \u00f6yle s\u0131k\u0131 kucaklam\u0131\u015ft\u0131 ki bir daha hi\u00e7 b\u0131rakmaz sanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131m. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc anneler \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131 asl\u0131nda hi\u00e7 b\u0131rakmaz\u2026<\/p>\n Ona g\u00f6re \u201ck\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir k\u0131zd\u0131m\u201d ben. Bana kalsa koca kad\u0131n\u2026 Sonra anlad\u0131m ben onun yan\u0131nda \u00e7ocuktum\u2026 \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u00e7ocuklar annelerinin yan\u0131nda hi\u00e7 b\u00fcy\u00fcmezler\u2026<\/p>\n \u00c7ok konu\u015fmazd\u0131 Ferdi\u015f. Ama sevgisini de k\u0131zg\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 da anlatmaya bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131 yeterdi. Bir insan sevgisini sadece dokunarak nas\u0131l anlat\u0131r o bana dokundu\u011funda anlad\u0131m. Sevgi onun sadece kalbinde de\u011fil y\u00fcz\u00fcnde ellerinde, incecik parmaklar\u0131ndayd\u0131. Ve bir \u201cyavrum\u201d demesi, bir sar\u0131lmas\u0131 d\u00fcnyaya bedeldi\u2026<\/p>\n \u00a0\u201cBiz sevgi nedir hi\u00e7 dile getirmezdik, ama bir sar\u0131lmas\u0131 vard\u0131, d\u00fcnyaya de\u011ferdi, binlerce s\u00f6z gelse anlatamazd\u0131 o sevgiyi\u2026\u201d<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n G\u00f6zlerini yumduktan sonra iki gece morgda Ferdi\u015f. O\u011fullar\u0131 analar\u0131yla vedala\u015fabilsin diye iki g\u00fcn beklettik. Son veda, son kucakla\u015fma i\u00e7in\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cAnnem tam\u0131 tam\u0131na 7 g\u00fcn sokakta kald\u0131\u2026 Hi\u00e7birimiz uyuyamad\u0131k, k\u00f6pekler gelir, ku\u015flar konar diye, o orada yatt\u0131 biz 150 metre ilerisinde \u00f6ld\u00fck\u2026 Bir insan bir insana ne kadar ac\u0131 \u00e7ektirebilirse devlette bize 7 g\u00fcnde bunu yapt\u0131. 7 g\u00fcn tam 7 g\u00fcn annenizin cenazesi sokak ortas\u0131nda kals\u0131n\u2026 \u0130nsan \u00e7ok iyi olam\u0131yor, insan kalam\u0131yor\u2026\u201d<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n Cenaze i\u015flemleri i\u00e7in morga gitti\u011fimizde bir \u00e7ekmecenin i\u00e7indeydi. Benim annem buz gibi morgda\u2026 Bir \u00e7ekmecenin i\u00e7inde\u2026 Benim annem. \u0130nsan iyi olam\u0131yor.<\/p>\n Y\u0131kamak i\u00e7in morgdan ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda bedeni buz gibiydi. Sade \u00f6l\u00fcmden de\u011fil so\u011fuktan\u2026 Son kez y\u0131kad\u0131k annemi. \u0130ncitmekten korkarak\u2026 Y\u0131kad\u0131k sevdik. Sevdik \u00f6pt\u00fck. Yok hi\u00e7 korkmad\u0131k. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc insan annesinden korkmaz\u2026<\/p>\n \u201cAnnemin elleri kaskat\u0131 olmu\u015f ve \u00f6yle s\u0131km\u0131\u015f ki e\u015farb\u0131n\u0131 belli ki can\u0131 hayli ac\u0131m\u0131\u015f, \u00f6pt\u00fcm ellerinde helal et hakk\u0131n\u0131 diye ama\u2026 Kan\u0131 kurumu\u015f annemin, elleri, y\u00fcz\u00fc ki y\u00fcz\u00fc d\u00fc\u015ferken toprak olmu\u015f, elbiseleri kandan \u0131slanm\u0131\u015f sonra kurumu\u015f, sonra ta\u015f olmu\u015f annemin\u2026\u201d<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n Bundan tam 22 ay \u00f6nce 20 Mart\u2019ta bilmem ka\u00e7 metrekare derinli\u011finde ve geni\u015fli\u011finde a\u00e7\u0131lan \u00e7ukura koydular annemi. Annem cans\u0131zd\u0131. Annem bir tabutun i\u00e7indeydi. Kimse konu\u015fmas\u0131n istedim. Kimse g\u00fclmesin. D\u00fcnya var ya \u015fu bir dursun bir d\u00f6nmesin\u2026 Islak karanl\u0131k bir topra\u011fa koydular annemi. Martt\u0131 hava so\u011fuk de\u011fildi. Cans\u0131zd\u0131 ama ben yine de evet yine de \u00fc\u015f\u00fcr diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnebildim. Kah\u0131rd\u0131\u2026 \u00a0Evet ya\u015fl\u0131yd\u0131 annem evet bir g\u00fcn \u00f6lecekti ama yine de erkendi\u2026 Topra\u011f\u0131na dokunup b\u00f6\u011f\u00fcre b\u00f6\u011f\u00fcre a\u011flad\u0131m. Annem eceliyle \u00f6lm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc, yine de isyan ettim.<\/p>\n \u00a0\u201c Nas\u0131l bir ac\u0131 demeyece\u011fim zira a\u011f\u0131r. Yedi g\u00fcn benim annem, yedi g\u00fcn kara k\u0131\u015f so\u011fu\u011funda kald\u0131. En ac\u0131s\u0131, ka\u00e7 saat yaral\u0131 kald\u0131 bilememek. Ke\u015fke diyorum hemen \u00f6lm\u00fc\u015f olsa. Siz benim annemi \u00f6ld\u00fcrd\u00fcn\u00fcz.”<\/b><\/em><\/p>\n Yukar\u0131daki italik sat\u0131rlar Silopi’de sokakta vurularak \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclen ve yedi g\u00fcn boyunca cesedi sokaktan al\u0131namayan Taybet \u0130nan\u2019\u0131n o\u011fluna ait. Kalan sat\u0131rlarda ise bir insan annesini kaybetti\u011finde neler hisseder onlar\u0131 anlatmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131m. Taybet \u0130nan gibi cans\u0131z sokakta bekletilen bir annenin evlad\u0131 olmay\u0131 anlatacak s\u00f6zc\u00fckleri ben bulamad\u0131m. Cenazesi yedi g\u00fcn boyunca sokakta kald\u0131 Taybet \u0130nan\u2019\u0131n. \u00c7ocuklar\u0131 yedi g\u00fcn boyunca sokak ortas\u0131nda cans\u0131z yatan annelerine bakt\u0131lar.<\/p>\n Ac\u0131dan kavrulur insan\u2026 Par\u00e7a par\u00e7a yanar ac\u0131dan. B\u00f6\u011f\u00fcre b\u00f6\u011f\u00fcre a\u011flamaktan ci\u011feri \u015fi\u015fer\u2026 \u0130nsan\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fc d\u00f6ner\u2026<\/p>\n Benim annem \u00f6ld\u00fc, \u00e7ok \u00fcz\u00fcld\u00fcm\u2026 Ya\u015fl\u0131yd\u0131 evet ama yine de erkendi\u2026 \u00c7ok a\u011flad\u0131m. Bir daha annemin sesini duyamayacakt\u0131m\u2026 Bir daha incecik parmaklar\u0131yla ellerimi ok\u015fayamayacakt\u0131\u2026 Bir daha sar\u0131lamayacakt\u0131m\u2026<\/p>\n Sonra b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fcm\u2026 Ama aradan aylar ge\u00e7mesine ra\u011fmen onunla ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m her an\u0131 g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn kenar\u0131nda ya\u015f biriktirir. Bo\u011faz\u0131ma yumruk oturur. Hala \u00f6zl\u00fcyorum\u2026 Sesi kulaklar\u0131mda, kokusu burnumda\u2026 \u015eimdi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcn hanginizin de\u011fil. Hangimiz sevdiklerimizin \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcne isyan etmiyoruz. Eceliyle bile olsa. Hangimiz i\u00e7in erken de\u011fil.<\/p>\n Taybet \u0130nan hala g\u00f6m\u00fclemedi. Hala morgda bekletiliyor. Bir \u00e7ekmecede. So\u011fukta\u2026 \u00c7ocuklar\u0131 ne y\u0131kayabildiler, ne g\u00f6mebildiler, ne de topra\u011fa koyup vedala\u015fabildiler anneleriyle. Ama b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fcler. Birden bire ve kopkoyu bir nefretle\u2026\u00a0 Elbet bir g\u00fcn bu topraklarda bar\u0131\u015f tekrar konu\u015fulmaya ba\u015flan\u0131r. Bu ak\u0131l tutulmas\u0131 sona erer. \u00a0Ama Taybet \u0130nan\u2019\u0131n \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n g\u00f6zlerine oturan karanl\u0131\u011f\u0131, y\u00fcreklerine yerle\u015fen nefreti bitirmeye yeter mi? Sanmam. Anneler sokak ortas\u0131nda, \u00e7ocuklar derin dondurucuda cans\u0131z beklerken bar\u0131\u015f da karde\u015flik de gittik\u00e7e uzakla\u015f\u0131yor. Geriye koca bir Ah\u2026 Ve nefret kal\u0131yor\u2026 Ah\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Leyla Alp T24.com.tr, 08.01.2016 İnsanın sevdikleri ne kadar uzun yaşarsa yaşasın yine de kısadır. Çünkü paylaşılacak yarım kalmış onlarca şey kalmıştır. Yarım kalan sohbetler, gidilmeyen yerler, kavuşamayan kollar, yatılmayan dizler vardır. Daha yenilecek yemekler, tutulacak eller, silinecek yaşlar vardır. Sevdiğiniz insanlar ne kadar uzun yaşarsa yaşasınlar onları kaybettiğinizde içinizde mutlaka bir kimsesizlik çöker. Çünkü ölüm […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_bbp_topic_count":0,"_bbp_reply_count":0,"_bbp_total_topic_count":0,"_bbp_total_reply_count":0,"_bbp_voice_count":0,"_bbp_anonymous_reply_count":0,"_bbp_topic_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_reply_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_forum_subforum_count":0,"ocean_post_layout":"","ocean_both_sidebars_style":"","ocean_both_sidebars_content_width":0,"ocean_both_sidebars_sidebars_width":0,"ocean_sidebar":"0","ocean_second_sidebar":"0","ocean_disable_margins":"enable","ocean_add_body_class":"","ocean_shortcode_before_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_after_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_before_header":"","ocean_shortcode_after_header":"","ocean_has_shortcode":"","ocean_shortcode_after_title":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_bottom":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_bottom":"","ocean_display_top_bar":"default","ocean_display_header":"default","ocean_header_style":"","ocean_center_header_left_menu":"0","ocean_custom_header_template":"0","ocean_custom_logo":0,"ocean_custom_retina_logo":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_height":0,"ocean_header_custom_menu":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_family":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_subset":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_size":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_unit":"px","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_line_height":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_unit":"","ocean_menu_typo_spacing":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_unit":"","ocean_menu_link_color":"","ocean_menu_link_color_hover":"","ocean_menu_link_color_active":"","ocean_menu_link_background":"","ocean_menu_link_hover_background":"","ocean_menu_link_active_background":"","ocean_menu_social_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_links_color":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_color":"","ocean_disable_title":"default","ocean_disable_heading":"default","ocean_post_title":"","ocean_post_subheading":"","ocean_post_title_style":"","ocean_post_title_background_color":"","ocean_post_title_background":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_image_position":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_attachment":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_repeat":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_size":"","ocean_post_title_height":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay":0.5,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay_color":"","ocean_disable_breadcrumbs":"default","ocean_breadcrumbs_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_separator_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_hover_color":"","ocean_display_footer_widgets":"default","ocean_display_footer_bottom":"default","ocean_custom_footer_template":"0","ocean_post_oembed":"","ocean_post_self_hosted_media":"","ocean_post_video_embed":"","ocean_link_format":"","ocean_link_format_target":"self","ocean_quote_format":"","ocean_quote_format_link":"post","ocean_gallery_link_images":"off","ocean_gallery_id":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12862","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tarih","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12862","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12862"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12862\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12864,"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12862\/revisions\/12864"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12862"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12862"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.circassiancenter.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12862"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nT24.com.tr, 08.01.2016<\/p>\n